Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Bad Mommy... :-(

I am having a bad mommy day. Today was supposed to be a normal day, go to work come home, do some cleaning, you know what I mean. The USUAL.  No, due to record heat, I had to leave work half way through the day, as they closed the schools.

Now I can understand why they closed the schools, some schools don't have air conditioning, so they have to close them when it gets this hot. I can even understand that with the bus schedules that they have to close all the public schools in the county. However, what I don't understand is why they then have to close my son's private school, which has A.C., and the busing is done by a contracting company.

Oh well, at least this time I found out ahead of time, rather than by the bus company when they were in front of my house.

So I left work early and when "Monkey Boy (MB)" got home from school, I took him to run some errands I was just too lazy to do over the holiday weekend. Now I have not really talked about "MB" before, partly because I am so new to blogging. "MB" is autistic, how severe is a bone of contention between the experts. Between severe and moderate would be a good way to phrase it. He can talk, but is incapable of holding a real conversation. I tell people to look at him as a giant 3-4 year old, as that really seems to be where his development has stalled.

That being the case, taking him on errands is like running a marathon, when part of the course is made of quick sand. I never know when my sweet MB is going to turn into demon spawn. Lucky for me, we got thru the errands I needed to run, and he was wonderful. Of course that might have been the doughnuts and the movie I let him pick out why we were out. I am sorry, some times bribery works.

I would say that my bad mood started on the way home, when he broke the movie, trying to get it out of the case. Then he started screaming for McDonalds, over and over again. So I ignore him, and drive home. I unload my purchases, groceries, and start to put everything away. Meanwhile MB is less than 3 inches from my face, screaming for French fries. When I open the freezer to put the sherbet away he yanks the bag out and I get slammed on the top of the head with a frozen pot roast.

I saw stars and then I saw red. I flipped out; I yelled and then put MB in time out. Maybe I should have gone myself. He yelled in time out for about 30 min straight. We have a rule, he can not come one until he calms down.

Now I feel so guilty, for yelling. The problem is you can never really tell how much he understands in any given situation. So more than likely, I was screaming at a child who does not even understand why I was yelling…

Man I feel like crap….