Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Shaving and other hazzards

Ok, I haven't posted anything in 1000 years, but I am going to try post more often. I have been cyber stalking my new IBF (internet best friend) the wonderful Ninja...but don't tell her I have not yet convinced her that we are IBF's YET...

Well she posted a link about another great blogger about her nair experience. Which led to multiple women talking about shaving, nair, and other hair removing incidents. I mentioned that I had a friend who had to go to the emergency room due to a shaving incident. Aussa (The Ninja) demanded that I tell the story, to which I told pondered about making her wait as she is always starting to tell us the funniest stories, then telling us we have to wait for her blog post about it. Which usually takes several weeks.

Soooooo here goes....

Several years ago, I am sitting at home and my phone rings. It is my friend "Jane" who lived down the street. Jane asks me to come to her house immediately. As I am double checking to make sure the boy is asleep, I ask her what is wrong. There is no answer for about 40 seconds and then Jane tells me that she had an accident while shaving her legs.

Apparently she was sitting on the edge of her tub and shaving her legs while drinking a soda. She had placed the can on the bathroom floor. Then apparently while twisting and turning to ensure she had un chewbacca'd her legs she lost her balance on the edge of the tub and fell....

ON TOP OF THE SODA CAN. As the can tipped over under her weight, the opening on the can sliced the holy hell out of the outer lip of her va-jay-jay.

(now that any women reading this have grimaced, doubled over, and/or momentary stopped breathing...I will continue)

She apparently was bleeding quite a lot and wanted me to come look to tell her if she needed to go to the emergency room.  Jane and I were quite close, but something told me that would make us TOO close.  I called another friend to stay with the boy, told her to get dressed the best she could and I would be right down to take her to the ER.

Karma was right on the money by giving her a doctor that could have given McDreamy a run for his money. He even managed not to laugh when giving her 12 stitches. Although he did have a pretty big grin on his face...

Sooo there ya go Ninja girl...Hope it was worth the wait.

Monday, August 13, 2012

OMG...This did not happen

Ok, I may or may not have told you that I work in IT for a living...

Well we have a lot of power issues in our building, apparently they never heard of setting up a stable power source for over 5 million in computer equipment.

So this past weekend we were supposed to have some really nasty storms, so I unplugged all the work stations in my area so I would not have to spend the week replacing power supplies.

So after unplugging everything on Friday, I put up a large note, just inside in door...YOU CAN'T MISS IT.   It read "REMINDER, DON'T FORGET TO PLUG YOUR COMPUTERS BACK IN"

Well apparently that was not good enough... I had 5 users come into my office today

1 - to complain he had no power at his workstation

3 - to complain that even after they plugged the computers back in, they were not working
        It never occurred to me that I would have to tell them to turn them back on...

and last 2 to tell me that they plugged their computers back in and turned them on but they still were not working...They neglected to turn the monitors back on...

OMFG, are you kidding me...and I wonder why I get migraine headaches....

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Now what the hell do I do....

OK first off let me apologize, I know that for most people this is not a real problem. Its not life of death, and no one will die regardless of what I choose... But I am scared and not sure what to do...

I can't really turn to family without getting judged, so I figured I could just vent here. (EDIT - to be fair not my whole family)

I have been looking for a house on and off for a few years now. Currently, I rent a three story town house, but with my back, hip and knee problems I need to get away from stairs.

Finding the required space for "MB" and I, in a layout that works has not been easy. I think I found something today. The layout is fantastic, all the room we need and then some.

So, hey idiot what is the problem....(I imagine you yelling at me, some louder than others, you know who you are ;-)    )

It is at the very top of my price range, and would literally double what I am currently paying a month. I think I could do it, but am terrified about it. I work a contract position, which means it could go away. Currently the contract is supposed to be through 2016 but I have seen contracts end with almost no notice.

God, Goddess and whomever willing I would be able to find another contract. But if I spend money I could be putting in savings then what happens if it takes weeks or even months. What do I do if I take money that I could be putting away in case something happens...

Do I take a leap of faith, and go for the house?

Do I play it safe, and keep looking for a house that will be less perfect for us but more affordable?  Even though I have not found it after years of looking?

I just don't know what to do...Do I jump in the water, or stay safe on the dock?

Have you ever had to make a decision that had you this confused, or scared?  How did you decided?
Did it work out, or did you regret it later?

Monday, August 6, 2012

Hoping for Hope - Hope2012, A Blog Relay

My new friend Melanie, came up with an idea, a themed blog relay, like the Olympics. Only this is about hope


I have thought about this for several days, and to be honest the idea of writing about hope upsets me. Probably because in my life I have major issues with hope.

My son "MB" is autistic, and (even thought I hate most of the descriptions of people living on the autism spectrum) for the sake of this post I will use generalizations (forgive me, its easier and right now I need easy), he is considered moderate to severe.

My son will never graduate high school, never have a real job, never live alone. He is incapable of holding a conversation, or express his thoughts or dreams.

When I was pregnant, I had some many hopes, and dreams, but now I just don't know.

And then I look into my son's beautiful blue eyes, and my heart melts. I know in someways I am lucky. He can talk, and express basic wants and needs. He is a caring and loving young man

When I first started thinking about what I would write, it almost felt like an absence of hope, but as I watch my son and I look at the things he is able to do. Things that against all odds, he is now able to do, and I think it really is a hope for hope...

Monday, July 23, 2012

Making things worse - Media Coverage of The Colorado Tragedy

I have been very upset since the news broke last Friday about the movie theater shootings in Colorado.

Like most people in the US, I followed the news about this, searching for answers. How can someone have done this? What must the families be going through?

Then I started to get angry, not at the situation per say but at the media coverage.

 Morning Joe Scarborough, who gets on his TV show and spews some of the most horrific comments I have ever heard spoken

He starts off by saying that he does not want to generalize, but then goes on to say that the shooter was "on the autism scale."

Families dealing with Autism, and Autism spectrum disorders don't need this kind of garbage Joe. You of all people should know what we deal with having a child on the spectrum yourself. Families dealing with Autism Spectrum Disorders have higher rates of depression, and anxiety. First from dealing with the insane costs of dealing with the disorder, and secondly from a public who don't understand Autism and run from it like the plague. When you are dealing with Autism, you lose family, and friends. I have been asked to leave restaurants, and other public place because my son was acting out.

You, do us all a extreme harm, when you spout off on a subject you know nothing about Joe. You may understand Autism as it pertains to your son, but you don't know anything about this shooter.

If that weren't bad enough then the media decides to exploit a child. In the theater that night was a 13 year old CHILD who was there with family friends. A six year old child was with the group, this 6 year old tragically died in the shooting, and her mother was critically injured (as of today she is making progress but will be paralyzed). The 14 yr old, attempted to save the 6 year old after she was shot but was unable to do so.

My anger at this story is firmly divided between this child's mother Heather (CBS states their last name won't be given for privacy reasons...WHAT A CROCK) and CBS news. Heather for allowing them to interview her child in the first place, and CBS for what their reporter (slime monger - more likely) John Blackstone  asked this child. After having her describe what happened, he casually asks her if she will go to the movies again. The child is visually upset and says, no she doesn't think she will ever go to the movies again. Heartbreaking right. End of story right...NO this idiot asks her how she feels about the smell of popcorn.

WHAT are you flipping kidding me...This is a traumatized child and your going to trivialize what she has gone through. Shame on CBS for even airing this, and shame on this child's mother for letting them do it...

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Jinglehammer...The legend continues

So where we last left off Jinglehammer and been spiked int "A's" garden, with such overkill that a hurricane was not going to get him to move. There he sat for 7 straight days, until....

On Saturday morning, "A" walked out the front door to find her car parked at an angle at the end of her driveway. She walked to her car, and opened the door and lying in the drivers seat is Jinglehammer, an empty beer bottle and a empty pack of cigarettes. At that point "A" lost it laughing...when she calmed down she grabbed the bottle and empty cig pack and tossed them and when back to the car (I totally yelled at her for not taking pictures).

That was when she saw the new note on Jinglehammer... It read
Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride,
I'm never gonna walk such ground, oh no,
I've got to keep on movin'.

"A's" husband "B" called me to tell me that "A" was 45 minutes late to work this morning, because she could not stop laughing long enough to drive to work.

I only wish I had come up with these pranks..."B" my friend you are an evil genius.

Jinglehammer disappeared after that, "A" swears that she still has him but he has not been seen around the house since. "B" is convinced that she took him to work and is preparing to bribe a couple of her co-workers to find out.

I hope he finds Jinglehammer soon, I have not laughed this hard in ages.

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

You spent what???

Yes that is what I was asked today, when after being asked what I did over the weekend. My answer was simple, cleaned the house, grocery shopping, Tried to take "MB" sailing, and spent 10K on a dog.

That's right, you heard me correctly, I just spent 10K for a dog. A real live dog, not that I would not consider a taxidermy dog, but for 10K that dog would have to be gold plated and shit.

For those of you who someone have found this blog and are going Taxidermy Dog, what kind of freak are you?

Check out the bloggess, herself and her quest for a taxidermy miniature pony. This is such a awesome idea, that I immediately sent her an email, offering to chip in for it. If nothing else it will drive her husband Victor up the wall.

Ok, back to the 10K dog. For those who don't know I have a 14 year old son, nicknamed "Monkey Boy" or MB for short here in the blogosphere. MB, is autistic, with multiple other issue (Epilepsy, Anxiety, ADHD, and PMS (Psycho Mom Syndrome).

MB's issues make it difficult to go places. Every trip is a new adventure, and not always in a good way. I never know how he will react. One trip to the grocery store and everything is wonderful. The next trip he screams the entire time.

So I finally came up with the money to purchase him a service dog. The dog will be trained to deal with anxiety and calm him. In addition it will be trained to alert for seizures, and as a search and rescue dog.

I am not yet sure if what the sex will be but I do know that it will be a Cane Corso (pronounced Car-Knee Corso).


The color is not guaranteed, but really hope he/she is black. So yes, I have spent an insane amount of money on a dog, but if it gives "MB" more freedom then it will be worth every penny.

We should be picking the dog up around January, I will let you know how it works out.